Monday, 11 February 2008

I've not been in this process very long at all, I know people who have been waiting 2 years to bring their kids home, but I am struggling already.
I was hoping that by moving to Uganda to live things would be easier. I mean if I had to wait 2 years to get Nathanial he would be 4 or nearly 5 by that time - and that's an awful lot to miss out on! Whereas if I go and live in Uganda Nathanial will be able to come and live with me straight away.
So far no-one has been able to help me at all. Social services where I live have reffered me to another countys services because they don't deal with international adotions, so I wrote to them asking about homestudies, turns out that they dont do it for those living outside of their county - so I guess no one knows! I've tried talking to people in immigration they dont know, seems like my only option is to talk to an intercountry adoption specialist - who are by no means cheap! And obviously I dont qualify for legal aid - I guess if I had fifty million kids all with different dads - sat on my arse all day, smoked, drank, lived off benefits, lived in a council house, then yes - obviously I would get legal aid. Since, I've been back I've started to realise how unfair the system really is, the government is helping those (I'm being very general here, and I know that this isn't always the case) that aren't willing to help themselves. Ok, fair enough give them money - but give it to people who are trying to get out of the situation they are in. It's the people who earn enough money to survive on that don't get the help they need when they need it. To qualify for legal aid you have to be on some kind of benefit, but if a person who earns a minimum salary and isnt elligible for benfits, paying for a lawyer will then put them in debt. If you want a credit card or a loan you have to have debts in order to prove that you have previously paid owed money back.
What about the young girls in our society who have the mentality that having kids young is easy way to money. Well, I have to say that they aren't wrong - you do get a lot of money of you're under 16 or even under 18 - you get loads of benefits. Morally its very wrong - but the government are encouraging this kind of behaviour.

Anyway, I think thats enough ranting and raving from me!


Anonymous said...

It's understandable that you're frustrated and anxious to have Nathanial as your legal son as soon as possible, but it's sad you have such a low opinion of people on benefits. Speaking personally (as someone currently on benefits) life isn't as chushy as you might imagine. The media likes you to believe that we all sit around on our arses all day, gleefully spending tax payers' money, because an envious society that isn't happy with its 'lot' is a subsurvient, consumer-driven society. I won't bore you more with my take on it all, but try to keep in mind that life on benefits is a struggle for more people than it is a free ride to a cozy lifestyle.

Lisa(S) xx

isabelle said...

as I stated in my blog:'(I'm being very general here, and I know that this isn't always the case.' I am by no means assuming that life is 'chushy' for everyone - far from it.

I understand that there are people who genuinely require benefits - however unfortunately there are people who see benefits as an easy alternative to income (when they are perfectly fit and able to work) there are also people too lazy to work and I also those who cheat the system or lie, they are the people I am referring to.